Thursday, July 22, 2010

Ch-ch-changes

Aha. Ended up figuring out my last post's quandry within 24 hours of posting. It's not leagues-it's levels. Everybody's at different levels in regard to all these life aspects, and it's our individual responsibility to find someone with similar levels, who helps us push ourselves to new heights, and to weed out people who will drag us down. It's just that simple in my mind.

Anyways, the big revelation of the day is courtesy of a certain brilliant 8-year-old friend of mine, who looked at me and said "Clouds change. Just like people!"

I forget that people change. I mean, I know I change, but it always surprises me when I do. Like "oh! I grew a spine and can say no to people now?" That was a good discovery. Discoveries about yourself are awesome, and discoveries about changes in your relationships with people can be awesome. Like discovering that someone you thought you had nothing in common with is actually a kindred spirit.

But I think I'm afraid of other people changing. Even nasty people. It's what's familiar, and familiar certainly seems safe. But then you blink and suddenly people you used to find really interesting don't want to talk about anything but sororities, and somebody you used to look up to keeps on disappointing you. People change, and I find it absolutely terrifying because, for better or worse, it's scary to think the person you know now might not be that person one day. Or what if I turn into a worse person? Yuck yuck yuck.

After all, just look at Saul/Paul in the Bible, who completely changed for the better, going from persecuting Christians to preaching the good news. Then again, look at David, who went from being an incredible guy to a major f$%^ up who had Uriah the Hittite killed so he could get away with having knocked up his wife Bathsheba. So it's not just up to God how we change...we have to take responsibility for our own changes. Even the great can fall...but even the horrible can emerge from the muck.

At least we can hope and pray for changes for the better. I feel like if we use God as our one true compass, then we can't help but change for the better over time, though making those changes can be so difficult. Or at least, that's what I'm hoping.

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