Saturday, October 24, 2009

I Was Born in the Sign of Water

and its there that I feel my best...

I'm taking off for a week and heading to the beach with my family. I'm leaving the blog in the capable hands of my co-authors and I hope to come back refreshed and with maybe some new insights to share.

I've become rather disenchanted with spiritual retreats where other people tell me what they think it is I need to know. I think that perhaps the best model we have for spiritual retreats is Jesus. Big surprise there. Often after an intense period of ministry or testing he retreated alone to collect himself and recharge and reconnect with his purpose and his Father. This year has been an intense period for me, whether it is testing or just life beating me down I don't yet know. I do know that I am nearly desperate for some peace and time to be alone and collect myself and recharge and reconnect with my purpose and my Father. In that sense this trip is a spiritual retreat for me.

I have some thought provoking reading material (Donald Miller's newest book - A Million Miles in A Thousand Years) as well as some mindless diversions (dominoes, craft projects, tabloid magazines) and I am counting the minutes until my husband gets home and we can pack the van and head south.

I am seriously addicted to the online world so I'm expecting some pretty brutal withdrawal symptoms. I have cut and am continuing to cut my online presence and commitments as a result of conversations with Matt and revelations from my own instincts about things that have contributed to the drain on my time and energy that has me running for the ocean. I am sure there will be more such things pruned away before I return. If I disappear from some of the online places where our lives intersect know that this is likely why. Nothing personal.

"There's one thing in my life that's missing, its the time that I spend alone..." And I'm about to remedy that situation. Have a great week. I'll talk to you when I get back.

1 comment:

  1. You know... not being in church has been very much a spiritual renewal for me. Not being TOLD what I must think or feel or how to vote.. or any of that stuff. So many voices competing against HIS voice. In the silence, the scriptures rise into my heart and mind.... and in the middle of the noise of life and politics... walking among the homeless... in a doctor's waiting room... it is HIS voice I hear, not the voices that judge me and make me feel like giving up. Those voices are getting quieter and further away. Yes... I am looking for fellowship, but the kind that strengthens, not the kind that drains. Otherwise, I'm better off alone. Life is hard enough w/o just INVITING people into your life to rape you spiritually & emotionally... or going to them and asking for it 3x a week or more.

    I do need community. Right now... about all I get of that is at Kroger... LOL. But, those people at my little neighborhood Kroger are real people and they have big smiles for me.

    Jesus is closer to me than ever. He has less competition. The beach does sound like a nice place to spend time with Him.... LOL. But maybe not during hurrican season!