Saturday, August 14, 2010


I read my own posts and I wonder, "Am I becoming bitter"? It is a danger I must guard against because I know from experience it will only end up eating me alive. I believe, at this stage in the grieving/detoxing process that what is driving me to continue to rant about what happened to me and to others at the church we left is not bitterness but frustration at justice denied. Yes, at some point I will have to let it go for my own emotional and spiritual well-being but I suppose right now I still hold out some shred of hope that the right people will hear my lament and will yet insist that justice demands a different response than the one we have seen thus far. Occasionally I ponder what that response would look like.

The person who defamed my character and had it dismissed as a "mis-communication" would be man enough to acknowledge that he handled it poorly and would at least offer an apology. Too little too late? Yes. But there is something to be said for an honest effort at trying to make amends.

The church would acknowledge that their handling of the situation involving the worship band member was inadequate and wrong and would take steps to re-train their administration in POK policy and the rules of mandated reporting. The ban against this person serving in youth work again would be for life. The church would apologize to the victim for the horrible response of their senior pastor at the time to her letter of concern and would provide details of what had been done thus far regarding counseling and disciplinary action rather than hiding behind "confidentiality". They would provide whatever assurances she needed to feel that other young women would be kept safe from his predatory behavior.

I really don't think that is too much to ask. Is it?

No comments:

Post a Comment